Digesting: Reese’s miniature peanut butter cups
Listening to: “Explode” by The Cardigans
Wanting: too much? everything?
It’s 8:43am and I’ve been up all night studying for a midterm and doing a problem set, which of course makes now the perfect time to update my Xanga.
Last week Microsoft asked me to do a second-round interview with them. My response was “Hell no, I already signed with Intuit!” It was really easy to say because I don’t want to work for Microsoft anyways. But yesterday Google asked me to interview for the position of Associate Product Manager, and now part of me is questioning whether it’s too good of an chance to pass up. First of all, Google is like my dream company. Well, so is Intuit, but I like them for different reasons — I grew to like Intuit because of the people and corporate culture, whereas I’ve always liked Google for its product (haven’t met the people yet). Secondly, the position would be the perfect opportunity for me to avoid becoming a code monkey, since APMs develop new product lines and although they’re required to have strong technical backgrounds, they don’t actually have to program. It would be a different career path.
So I have 2 choices. A) Go to the Google interview and fully disclose my actions to the Intuit people, which might cause them to withdraw their offer. And then I could end up unemployed if Google doesn’t take me, which is highly likely since the APM program is notoriously difficult to get into and some of the smartest kids I know didn’t get into it. Or B) Don’t go to the Google interview, stick with Intuit, and possibly end up a bitter, regretful, unhappy code monkey. I mean, I don’t hate programming or anything, but I don’t exactly LOVE it, nor do I want to do it forever. But then again, Intuit is a great company that has shown me nothing but love, whereas Google was really shitty to me last quarter (they switched recruiters on me and forced me to restart the whole interview process, cancelled 2 software engineering interviews at the last minute, ignored my e-mails, the UI engineering department never got back to me, etc.).
I know a lot of people don’t have jobs at all right now, so I’m lucky to have Intuit and shouldn’t be a greedy fucker. Plus it’s a shitty thing to do, taking an interview when you’ve already signed with another company. But I really don’t want to be a programmer forever, and the Google APM program looks really appealing. Gahh, I dunno. Right now I’m leaning towards sticking with Intuit, which is what I’ll probably end up doing, but this whole thing is making me feel more and more uncertain about my future. I want to have a career that I really love…is that being too idealistic?? Maybe, but then there are people like Drew and Henry, who are switching from CS/EE to pre-med in their senior year, and I think wow that’s so brave and I admire them for pursuing their dreams. Damn, I wish I was one of those hardcore CS 1337 geeks who enters programming contests for fun and wears “Linux by Choice!” t-shirts with great pride, then this wouldn’t be a problem.